Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
