So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Randomize
