Nicole vs. Life
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize