That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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