Jerry, you need to find god
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
