Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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