Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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