Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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