And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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