we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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