After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I need water and some morals
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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