If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Randomize
