I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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