I am in a vortex of obligation.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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