New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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