They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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