Texts From Last Night

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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.

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  (970): I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment. http://tfl.nu/cc9w
  Replies (9) Good night (3794) Bad night (1186)
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  (555): View more from

  After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.

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  (555): After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire. http://tfl.nu/pn7x
  Replies (6) Good night (4523) Bad night (837)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.

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  (917): Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities. http://tfl.nu/c8gk
  Replies (2) Good night (3111) Bad night (850)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.

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  (254): Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop. http://tfl.nu/r5qk
  Replies (7) Good night (1737) Bad night (962)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.

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  (269): quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it. http://tfl.nu/uc5u
  Replies (9) Good night (2325) Bad night (873)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.

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  (+44): I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday. http://tfl.nu/4in5
  Replies (6) Good night (710) Bad night (1373)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion

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  (203): I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion http://tfl.nu/g8mo
  Replies (11) Good night (2713) Bad night (498)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...

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  (406): Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms... http://tfl.nu/f4gr
  Replies (5) Good night (1160) Bad night (516)
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  (516): View more from New York

  History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.

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  (516): History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad. http://tfl.nu/o7dx
  Replies (3) Good night (1529) Bad night (429)
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  (435): View more from Utah

  I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!

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  (435): I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!! http://tfl.nu/1ljj
  Replies (13) Good night (2017) Bad night (424)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.

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  (954): in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine. http://tfl.nu/pi7u
  Replies (2) Good night (857) Bad night (369)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch

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  (248): I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch http://tfl.nu/n34v
  Replies (5) Good night (839) Bad night (304)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.

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  (270): Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash. http://tfl.nu/fwcr
  Replies (8) Good night (283) Bad night (835)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?

  (1-419): View more from Ohio

  .....fair enough

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  (419): it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong? (1-419): .....fair enough http://tfl.nu/x8b2
  Replies (0) Good night (494) Bad night (206)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....

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  (610): Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something..... http://tfl.nu/e8un
  Replies (0) Good night (573) Bad night (238)

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