Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
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