I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
