I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
