whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Randomize
