so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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