OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
