Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
There was a lot of him and a little penis
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
