OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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