Don't you send me to vm
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
