i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
They have beer where we have blood.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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