you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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