Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Randomize
