at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I have feelings that need drinking.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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