Cold hands, warm shart.
Screwed.edu
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
