He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
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