I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
