sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
