i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
