i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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