planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I love having hate sex.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
