its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize
