i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
