how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
