theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
