Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
