I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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