Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
