If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
