just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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