I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
