what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
