belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
