Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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